Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Black Ice?

The next big "event" of the month wasn't as fun as the last weekend get away. It's kind of long and probably confusing, but I'm adding in lots of detail, and all my thoughts that I never actually said (some or most of you may not know that I had). But I hope it makes sense when you read it.

I had made last minute plans, as usual. My last class ended at 3:00 on Friday. I couldn't decide if I was going to go home for the weekend. I had thought about it all week but just couldn't make up my mind. It was Spencer's Jr. prom (a big deal in Moab) so I should go, but spring break starts next weekend. . . can I afford to make 2 trips home right in a row, I should stay in Cedar. While talking to mom on the phone I decided I was going to go, I didn't care about the cost, I wanted to see my family and especially support my little brother on his big day. I ended up having to work so I went home and packed so I could leave strait from work. When I finally got off work I quickly got my dinner packed up and refilled my soda, I thought I might need it to make sure I stayed awake on the long drive.

I had enough gas in the car to make it to Richfield for sure, but I didn't want to make any stops on the way so I decided to fill the car the rest of the way so I could be on my way. I ate a few bites of dinner and then saved the rest for whenever I got hungry, it was getting late. As I pulled away from the gas pump I had a feeling I needed to send mom a text that I was on my way. That's weird I thought, I usually don't send her one until I'm already actually on the freeway "on my way". Oh well, I sent her one anyway. Before I had even left the city limits I could see small flurries of snow starting to fall. Immediately I thought, "I really don't want to drive in the snow tonight, I'm in a hurry! I don't even care, I'm going anyway." Mom had asked me if I should just wait and come in the morning since it was almost 9:00. Right away I disagreed, I'm already on my way, and by the time I go home and go to bed it will be late so I won't be able to wake up in the morning and the day will be half over before I get to Moab and make it almost pointless to have driven over there anyway. I'm coming tonight. I sent her another text that said something like "I'm still coming tonight. I'll be safe. I love you". I don't know why, but when I'm driving home I don't think I have ever sent her a text while driving that included " I love you". I remember I had a feeling that I needed to say it, but again, I didn't think anything of it.

The snow was starting to fall faster and faster. The thought came to me "maybe I should stay here tonight and just go in the morning", no! I talked myself out of it, I need to get there tonight. Now the snow was really coming down, but still the roads were only wet. The only thing I was worried about was driving so slow-I was in a hurry. Well, that thought kept coming to me that I should stay. Finally I had decided, I will get off the freeway at the next exit and I'll really think about it. While driving I called my mom to ask the number for road conditions. I got the number, she said she was going call also and see what the weather was going to be like for my drive home. We both called, and she heard the conditions before I did so she called me back. I was still on the phone with them listening for I70 road conditions. I transferred over to her call and told her I hadn't heard them yet, and she said "well I'll let you go so you can hear them" and I replied, "why don't you just tell them to me since you know what they are". (Thankfully!) At this point I realized I was on speaker phone so I could hear my family and they could hear me. She said "they are. . . um I forgot them already". I could hear everyone laughing and at that moment my heart started to race.

I was just north of Parown, I had missed the exit where I was going to stop to "think about staying", so I was looking for the next one. By now the snow was really starting to stick. I was driving in the right lane. I let off the gas to slow down so I could move into the left lane, it looked much more clear of snow than the one I was in. I remember thinking to not make sudden movements because I don't know how slick the road is. I slightly turned the wheel to move over. Naturally there was snow piled in between the lanes where no cars had driven. I remember thinking it looked kind of deep but not as bad as I have seen before. My tires hit the snow (or possible ice beneath it) and I felt the car start to slide. As I was still on the phone, and could hear my family laughing. I said "mom" in a shaky voice trying to stay calm, but I didn't think she heard me. So I said it again "mom" (more loudly), I didn't want to yell because I didn't want to worry her but I needed to get her attention. I didn't know what I was going to tell her, but I know I needed her to hear me.

The next minute or so went by so fast, but in slow motion at the same time. The car was sliding. The next thing I felt I knew I was spinning towards the median. I could see car lights all around me it seemed. All I could think of was don't slam on the breaks. For a minute it felt like it was smooth spinning, but then immediately it changed. I was still spinning, but it was very bumpy. I knew my car wasn't on the road anymore. I didn't know fast my car was moving but I knew it was headed in the direction of oncoming traffic. I think that was the moment real panic hit. I knew there was nothing I could do, and I remember then pushing on the breaks harder than I ever have before. I was just waiting for another car to hit mine, and I was just praying that it would be on the passengers side. Now I wasn't just spinning, but starting to roll. Boxes that were in the back seat were now next to me in front. I knew this was getting really bad. I opened my eyes and saw the plastic paneling that covered my seat belt break off the car. I felt something cold all over me. I thought for sure the window broke and I was covered with snow and glass. I had so many thought going through my head. Keep you head down so the top of the car doesn't hit it. Watch out for broken glass everywhere, so you don't get cut. Don't hit your head on the windshield. I closed my eyes and waited for it all to end.

I finally stopped moving and opened my eyes and tried to get them to focus. I realized I was still holding the phone to my ear. What was I going to tell mom? I didn't want her to worry her but I had to tell her what happened. "Mom, I just got in a wreck, but I'm ok. I'm upside down, but I'm ok." I don't remember our exact conversation in the next minute or so. Mom and dad asked where I was, just past Parowan but I really didn't know where exactly. I said I'm ok again and that I needed to go so I could call 911 and people had stopped to help me. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to have a delayed reaction from the airbag or something, so as I was just hanging by my seat belt, I was afraid to move or touch anything. After a few tries the people that had stopped to help were finally able to open my door and I was able to get out. As far as I could tell I wasn't hurt, but I think in a little bit of shock and wearing half of my dinner. I was breathing hard trying to keep my composure. While I was in the car on the phone with my family I remember thinking I need to keep them calm so they don't worry too much. I don't want them to worry and I need them to know that I'm ok. I think my efforts to keep them calm is really what kept me calm. Luckily we were right near a rest stop and I was taken there to wait for the police and EMT's to come.

A few minutes later and after lots of questioning they found I had no apparent serious injuries and let me decide if I wanted to go to the hospital. All I wanted to do was go home. My parents had made several phone calls and were able to get a hold of my bishop and some friends. I waited in the police car for the tow truck to come turn the car over so I could get a few things out that I needed for the night. Finally after a few hours, I got home and was greeted by the bishop and several close friends. I'll never forget how grateful I was for them as I was that night. I spent the night a their house and they took such good care of me. I was worried my parents would come to see me and miss watching Spencer go to prom. I knew it was so important to him. I wasn't able to sleep much that night. It seemed my heart just wouldn't stop racing and thought's wouldn't let my mind rest. "What if I have internal injuries that I can't feel yet?" I have a hard time accepting help, so It was hard for me to let others do everything for me. I felt so helpless.

As I look back I see I had the spirit with me guiding and protecting me. I didn't notice then, but now I see all the small things I did differently because of small promptings I felt. I was able to walk away without a single bruise or cut. Just back aches these days. Mom told me a statistic she herd: a rollover accident on the freeway has a 50% fatality rate. It wasn't until I heard that when I really realized just how lucky I am. Not only to still be alive, but to have been able to walk away unharmed. I am so thankful for Heavenly Father that I was able to have the spirit with me to guide and protect me in such a terrible circumstance. I love my family and friends so much and something like this really puts in perspective the things that are most important in your life.


Here are a few after pictures. . . I don't have any before. . .

The tracks from my car when it slid into the median


At the wrecking yard. . .
A look inside. . .

All Girls Weekend

While I have a free minute I figured I needed to do some updating. Needless to say, a lot has happened this month. . .

The first big event was the girls weekend together. It was a bit chaotic trying to get all the girls together, but at the last minute we were all able to make it up to American Fork for a little partying. Mom and I were the last ones to get there and so we all met up at Natalie's house and then we headed strait to Olive Garden for dinner. It was delicious! Then we went back to Natalie's and she gave us all a quick blogging lesson (which I'm finally putting to good use) and the we went to Sub-Zero for a little dessert. I had heard of this "fabulous" ice cream, but I had yet to taste it for myself. I got raspberry chocolate chunk, and I'll admit. . . it was fabulous.

On Saturday we did some shopping and then we made dinner at Sarah's house and made some cards. I brought my cricket and all my paper and supplies, and Natalie also brought her's, so between the two of us we had plenty to keep us busy while we watched a movie and relaxed.

I think this was the first time just the girls were able to spend a weekend together, at least that I can remember. It was really great! I forget how great my mom and sisters are when I don't get to see them for a long time. We laughed so much and had a great time together. I love them so much and I'm so blessed to have them in my life.